Top 12 Reasons the Incumbency Won By a Landslide

10. Hydrogen Sulfide poisoning is known to create dementia hence the 2/3 majority though they were actually voting for the "other" people.

9. The FBI rigged the election because they had been so entertained with the stream of fantastically comical complaints that they did not want the circus to change and hence be deprived of the amusement.

8. The FDEP rigged the election for fear that a real new council would actually have them indicted for sanctioning the historically catastrophic pollution that occurred on Marco Island.

7. The saturation of misaligned and unnecessarily costly street lights on Collier Blvd. caused a form of blindness that destroys the ability to read ballots correctly.

6. Given the dearth of "newspapers" anywhere near Marco Island, the majority read in whatever they had lying around the house that they were actually voting for Bill Clinton, Spiro Agnew, Andrew Johnson and Richard Nixon.

5. The Syndicate was so effective at intimidating a "newspaper" into having two reporters fired for reporting the truth that they (the syndicate) accomplished the same maneuver ... on the Collier County Board of Elections.

4. Why change? The real estate economy was in great shape, the tourist traps were booming, one "special" food place had more seating capacity than allowed by law, the city was awash in cash, the asbestos dump not a mile from a school was no big deal and the Marriott was happy.

3. To get rid of those pestilent 3,500 "other" people who are nothing but obnoxious obstructionists for not wanting yet another failing vacuous South Florida community.

2. Because of the guy who dictated the zany campaign for the slate of losing candidates ... what was his name?

1. The Syndicate.

0. Because the losing slate's seemingly sole mantra of "STOP STRP" was interpreted by the citizenry to mean "STOP Sending The Republicans Prayers" and with 90% registered Republicans on the island ... what a blunder.

-1. The mob rant of "Shoot Them" at a Klan-like rally was taken seriously, hence many people voted for the "right" slate ... just in case.