Marco Island BLOG: Billing for Services

Thursday, November 29, 2007

Billing for Services

As we all know, the present governance is looking to take many services from under the "cap" and in many cases bill them directly to the residents.

To that end, the following is the hypothetical monthly bill that each resident will receive if the present governance has their way:

City of Marco Island
Monthly Combined Utility & Tax Bill
(Prototype)

Utility Related Charges

Water - As Is
$25.00

Water - Reuse
$0.00

Water - Drinking (Not from City Water)
$9.00

Sewage
$25.00

Sewage Treatment Plant Repair
$9.00

Sewage Treatment Plant Upgrade
$87.33

Sewage Treatment Plant Deep Injection Well # 45
$22.80

Beach Cleanup from Deep Injection Wells Suffusing Aquifer w/Contaminated Water Fund
$18.22

Reimbursement to Fortune 500 Hotel Chains for Loss of Business due to Beach Cleanup from Deep Injection Wells Suffusing Aquifer w/Contaminated Water
$109.67

Lease Payments for Fleet of Sewage Lift-Station Pumping Trucks
$99.20

Bond Interest Payments on Completed Phases of STRP
$45.00

Compensation to Family of Jorge Viera for being killed Implementing STRP
$0.00

Reimbursement to Contractor that Paid OSHA Fine Regarding Jorge Viera being killed Implementing STRP
$1.00

Special Assessment
(not subject to "Cap")

Fire Department
$14.75

Parks & Recreation
$1.25

Public Information Department (City-Wide Subscription to Naples Daily News)
$.50

Former City Manager Never-Ending Departure Compensation Package
$9.20

Police Chief Never-Ending Job Search Assistance Fund
$2.55

Police Chief Marital Issues Support Fund
$.60

Former Councilpersons Legal Defense Fund
$1.60

Jolley Bridge Toll - Supplemental Expenses
$1.90

Contractor Asbestos Cleanup Reimbursement
$45.80

"Marco Man" - Ray Charles Visual Art Appreciation Award
$1.40

Attorneys Fees: Hydrogen Sulfide Class Action Lawsuit
$809.09

"Teen" Center
$3.45

"Pre-Teen" Center
$1.20

"Post-Teen" Center
$2.00

"Post-Mortem" Center
$56.99

Stipend for resurrected Political Action Committee to hold more Hate Rallies (with wine and cheese)
$.80

Dog Defecation Monitoring Department
$.44

STRP Economic Impact Reimbursement Plan for Businesses
$2,909.55

STRP Economic Impact Reimbursement Plan for Residents
$0.00

Your Present Governance at Work!

2 Comments:

That is the best laugh
(albeit on we the residents) that I've had all year. Thanks!! That was just priceless!

By Anonymous, at Thursday, November 29, 2007 9:38:00 PM
forgot a couple (thanks to readers)

*Bond Payment to Repay Legal Fees Defending Frivolous Lawsuits
$23.66

*119 Department (a new department to process the avalanche of past and forthcoming 119 requests)
$6.08

By Daring to Speak, at Friday, November 30, 2007 11:26:00 AM

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The Marco Island Blog strongly supports the cityhood of Marco Island, having its own police, fire and emergency services, its own public works, its community and park initiatives, having its own government and much much more.

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It is the duty - the obligation - of every citizen to question, inspect and critique the actions of government. Such is one of the basic tenets of a democracy.

"I am for freedom of the press, and against all violations of the Constitution to silence by force and not by reason the complaints or criticisms, just or unjust, of our citizens against the conduct of their agents." Thomas Jefferson

As we are.

On Marco Island: Independent Reporting, Documenting Government Abuses, Exposing the Syndicate, Historical Records of Crimes Against the Environment

Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof; or abridging the freedom of speech, or of the press; or the right of the people peaceably to assemble, and to petition the Government for a redress of grievances.

Thursday, November 29, 2007

Billing for Services

2 Comments:

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On Marco Island: Independent Reporting, Documenting Government Abuses, Exposing the Syndicate, Historical Records of Crimes Against the Environment Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof; or abridging the freedom of speech, or of the press; or the right of the people peaceably to assemble, and to petition the Government for a redress of grievances.
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